18 February 2013

Why do I always get the weird ones?

Today I had cause to take a short taxi ride to collect some boxes full of other boxes which were too big and heavy and too many for me to carry through the streets of Sydney in my arms.  So into the back seat of the taxi I did jump.

And I couldn't help but notice that just in front of the taxi driver's left ear was a huge pimple, ready to pop.  So ready it was weeping.  And it seemed to move with the g-force generated by the taxi driver's exit from the rank and his abrupt stop behind a slower moving vehicle two metres in front of us.

In this start stop fashion we went to the longest way possible that a taxi driver can go without being accused of fare boosting via fraudulent directions and he spent the entire time telling me stories about Blackberry's innovations in the smartphone arena and how rich people custom order their smartphones to have diamonds inserted and how there is a phone (insert made up name which changed twice) which combines Apple and Samsung's technology and is all part of one uber-phone that can have two sim cards.  Or something. And how it was innocent women like myself who were being exploited by Apple, particularly Steve Jobs, with their iPhones because they had my data captive and sold it to marketing companies who targeted women who like Apple products.  Ummmm.... Steve Jobs is dead dude.  But I said this inside my head because I was desperate not to engage.

Not nutty like this - normally nutty

But I'd already asked before I got in the cab if he'd wait at the other end so I couldn't even lose the obviously deranged individual by paying him off and hailing another cab.  Well maybe some people could but I'm hopeless in situations like that.  And then, when I went to get the boxes, he followed me on foot to make sure I didn't do a runner.

And then he dropped me back at work, in complete silence, like he was a normal taxi driver.  With a big pimple.

Am I the only person that attracts nutters like this?


6 comments:

  1. Sorry Al, but you totally are. Maybe it's just a Sydney thing? You make our life in the country seem mighty quiet! :)

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    1. I was collecting boxes. It should have been less weird. Honest

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  2. Nope. T & I do too. I think we give of friendly vibes. Or something. Perhaps like attracts like?

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    1. You do give off friendly vibes. And you're weird. :-) but not taxi driver weird

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  3. No. I attract them too. like moths to a flame :-)
    You are hilarious x

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    1. Thank you. But it seems Sair is the only non nutter attracted so far. We should start a club :-)

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