2 July 2014

Why do I wear make-up?

This is why people avoid having children.  Because they always ask the curly questions at breakfast time when you haven't got the time to formulate an appropriate response which ticks all the 'model positive non gender specific body imagery to my daughters' boxes.

My darling husband was asked if he had make-up on as he dashed out the door this morning.  He calls back 'No'. She yells 'Why?'.  He yells as he opens the door 'Because I'm a boy' and out he goes.

Ahem Nick. Real men wear make up
You'll be pleased everybody that even has he shouted back you could hear him trailing his answer off thinking 'Damn it, Al's going to have to explain that boys can wear make up if they want to as well. I should have thought that through more'.  Either that or it was just the door slamming as he bolted for the bus I could hear pulling up even as he vanished into the day.

Actually, lets be honest.  He never gave it another thought.  And he made the bus.

'Mama, do you have make-up on'.

'Yes'.

'Why?'

'Ummmmmmm, it makes me feel tidy'.

Yep.  That's what I came up with.  It makes me feel TIDY.  I have never in my life sought a state of 'TIDY'.  I don't even know what the freaky fahk I meant.  Thankfully, she's three.

'Oh. Like when we pick up the toys?'

'Yes. Do you want some more milk?'

'Yes. Can I leave the table?'

'When you finish your milk.'

And the morning fell into its usual state of pre child-care chaos. But I know that she will come back to this question, and that her sister will as well.  And I am going to need a better answer than 'TIDY'.  'TIDY' is up there with 'I carried a watermelon'.

Why do I wear make-up?  If I was brutally honest with myself it's because I don't have the self confidence to face the day with my own, um, well, face.  The evening out of 39 year old skin with a bit of foundation, some mascara to open up the eye, eyeliner because otherwise everybody asks if I'm tired, all makes me feel a little more confident.

Even when I'm working from home.  Alone.

Basically - make-up gives me 'GAME ON' face. It's part of the uniform.  It's dress up. It's as much part of my routine as deodorant and moisturiser.

Bringing his game face
This is not the appropriate response to give small people.  I know that.  I absolutely do.

So when they ask again?  What am I going to say?

Probably 'Ummmmmmm, do you want some more milk?'.

What would you say?

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